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Exactly one month ago I was playing a tournament. I was playing one of my best rounds of the season & I kept telling myself "this is the day you achieve your goal." My goal was to break my record and shoot in the 70's. I was playing so well & I had my parents and brother out to support me which made the day all the more special.
I was playing so well that I had completely forgotten that earlier that morning I had woken up with a sharp pain in my right shoulder. Thinking it was nothing more then having slept on my shoulder wrong I took some Ibuprofen and headed off to the tournament. I played pain free until hole 6 when I hit a shot fat which caused the pain I had felt earlier that morning to instantly come back. Not wanting to throw away a good round I played through the pain and managed to make a 20 foot putt to save par on that hole.
While waiting on the 7th tee, we had a short but strong downpour. Enough rain to dampen the fairways and rough. Still experiencing the shoulder pain I was able to signal my dad and point to my shoulder to let him know that something wasn't right. But again, not wanting to throw away my best round of the season, continued to play through the pain.
My tee shot on 7 landed just off the right edge of the fairway, leaving me in the thick & wet rough. Once I got to my ball I saw how deep in was in the rough and knew it would take a good amount of effort to get it up. I grabbed my club and took a few practice swings, still feeling the pain. I then addressed my ball and swung.
I didn't even notice the ball barely made it out of the rough because I was doubled over clutching my shoulder. I don't like to cry on the golf course because it messes with my mental game but this day I did. And I couldn't stop crying. The pain I felt when I hit that shot was so awful I felt like I had torn something. To even try to move it was extremely painful.
Having not moved from that spot for a few minutes the girls I were playing with came over to see what was wrong. I told them, through tears, that something had happened in my shoulder and I was in severe pain. Both girls were super sweet and helped to calm me down a little bit. I then walked to my ball and looked over at my parents and pointed to my shoulder and shook my head. My dad then took off down the fairway to go find my coach and my mom and brother told me to hang tight and try to finish the hole. My next few shots were horrible and by time I finally had putted out I was in full tears and holding my shoulder because I was in so much pain.
By time my coach showed up I knew I had to withdraw from the tournament. It pained me to say it but I told my coach "I need you to withdraw me, I can't do this" and she simply nodded her head and carted me in the clubhouse to get some ice before my parents would whisk me off to see the doctors.
Being carted in only made me cry harder because I had to pass my teammates and seeing their confused facial expressions hurt. I hated having to leave without explaining what was happening. Although I know I wasn't, I feel as though I was letting my team down and that's the worst feeling ever.
Long story short, I was diagnosed with right rotator cuff tendonosis (basically inflammation of the muscles in my rotator cuff). I was told to sit out for a week or two and then I should be back to normal and out playing again. Two weeks passed and I felt no different. I was still in so much pain that I could barely hold a pencil to take notes during class.
Last week I was feeling so much better after going to physical therapy and having acupuncture done that the doctors cleared me to play again. I was ecstatic and couldn't wait to tell my teammates and get back out on the course.
My dad & I decided it would be a good idea to play a round before I go back to playing an official tournament so we headed out to play this past Friday. I was so excited to play and couldn't wait to get out on the course. I pared the first hole but after that I slowly felt the pain coming back. I then began to hit bad shot after bad shot and told my dad that I was in pain. My physical therapist had told me I would have some discomfort while playing but this was past discomfort, I was in pain.
Wanting so badly to be back with my teammates I continued to play. On the 5th hole I ended up in a bunker right up against the lip. Upon making contact with the hard sand and my club catching the lip of the bunker I instantly felt almost the same pain I felt the day I injured my shoulder.
I told my dad I was in pain and we decided to stop and head back in. I was an emotional mess because I knew this meant I would be out for the season. I couldn't bare to tell my coach but mostly, my teammates. I knew they were looking forward to me making my comeback but I'm just not there yet. Off the course, my shoulder seemed fine, but on the course, my shoulder isn't quite there yet.
Today I told my teammates that I am out for the season. I told them in person because I feel that this news is not something you can share over a group message. Tears were shed and lots of hugs were exchanged but we all know that it's better to completely heal my shoulder then to jump back in and risk a further injury.
I'm beyond grateful for all the support I've received from my teammates and family and can't wait to be back & fully healed for my senior season next year!
xoxo,